toxic masculinity v4.1 (copy)

# Understanding Healthy Masculinity and Challenging Misogyny Online

_In-person discussion · 75 min · English · ages 13–15_

---

## Slide 1 — Title

- Understanding Healthy Masculinity and Challenging Misogyny Online
- A Year 9 Discussion
- Facilitator: _________

_Speaker note: Welcome students warmly. Establish that this is a safe space for genuine conversation — no judgment, all questions welcome. Ground the session in the real world they inhabit: online platforms, peer groups, and the messages they encounter every day._

---

## Slide 2 — Why we're here today

- Some of you may have seen content online from influencers like Andrew Tate or similar figures
- Girls in this year group have told us this content makes them feel uncomfortable at school
- We want to understand what's happening, why it appeals to people, and what healthy masculinity actually looks like
- This is about respect, critical thinking, and looking out for each other

_Speaker note: Reference the trigger without naming individuals or the tutor who flagged it. Keep the tone curious and non-accusatory. Acknowledge that boys may have encountered this content without intending to, and that girls' discomfort is real and valid._

---

## Slide 3 — What we'll cover today

- What is the "manosphere" and who are its key figures?
- How do social media algorithms push extreme content to you?
- Healthy masculinity vs. harmful stereotypes
- The real impact on girls and peer relationships
- How to think critically about online content and challenge harmful language
- Where to get support

_Speaker note: This agenda mirrors the six modules. Emphasise that we're not lecturing — we're exploring together through discussion and scenarios._

---

## Slide 4 — What is the manosphere?

- A network of online communities promoting misogynistic and anti-feminist ideas
- Andrew Tate is a prominent example: claims about women's roles, "self-improvement" courses, promises of success
- Often frames women as inferior or responsible for men's problems
- Attracts teenage boys by offering a sense of belonging and simple answers

_Speaker note: Keep this factual and abstract. Do not show graphic content. Acknowledge that some students may have encountered Tate's name or clips at break or online. Ask: "What messages have you heard?" and listen without judgment. The appeal often lies in promises of success, belonging, and clarity — emotions that matter to teenagers._

---

## Slide 5 — Why does this content spread so fast?

- Algorithms on TikTok and YouTube Shorts track what you watch, like and share
- They recommend more of the same — even if you didn't search for it
- Extreme content gets more engagement (likes, shares, comments) than balanced content
- Platforms profit from engagement, not from truth or balance

_Speaker note: Use the case study from the synthesis: a boy watches fitness videos, and within hours, 76% of his feed is misogynistic material. This is not his fault — it's how the algorithm works. Help students see the system, not blame individuals. Ask: "Have you noticed this on your own feed?"_

---

## Slide 6 — The business model behind influencers

- Influencers like Tate profit from engagement and outrage
- They sell "self-improvement" courses, merchandise, and exclusive content
- The more controversial the message, the more people talk about it
- They don't care if the message is true — they care if it gets clicks

_Speaker note: This is a critical literacy skill. Help students see that influencers have a financial incentive to be extreme. Ask: "Who profits when you watch, like or share this content?" This shifts the focus from the message itself to the system that amplifies it._

---

## Slide 7 — Healthy masculinity: what does it actually look like?

- Emotional awareness and openness — naming feelings, not suppressing them
- Respect for others, especially girls and women, as equals
- Accountability — taking responsibility for your actions and their impact
- Collective wellbeing — caring about others' safety and belonging, not just your own status
- Strength in kindness, not dominance

_Speaker note: Contrast this with harmful stereotypes: dominance, control, suppression of emotion, entitlement. Use Gareth Southgate as a positive example — his message about emotional resilience as strength. Ask: "What does this version of masculinity look like in your own life? In your friends?"_

---

## Slide 8 — The impact on girls and peer relationships

- Girls report feeling unsafe or uncomfortable when boys share misogynistic content
- Jokes about women's bodies or roles affect girls' sense of belonging in school
- When boys rate girls or make degrading comments, it changes the dynamic in the room
- Girls deserve to feel respected and safe in their peer group

_Speaker note: This is not about blaming boys — it's about impact. Help students develop empathy by asking: "How would you feel if your sister or friend heard this?" Acknowledge that girls in this cohort have raised concerns, and that their voices matter._

---

## Slide 9 — Critical questions to ask about online content

- Who created this? What is their background and motivation?
- Who profits from you watching, liking or sharing it?
- What message is being sold? Is it fair and accurate?
- Who does this message harm?
- What would a balanced, respectful version of this message look like?

_Speaker note: Teach this framework explicitly. Apply it to a short, age-appropriate clip or post from a manosphere influencer if possible. Help students practise asking these questions in a low-stakes way so they feel confident using them in real life._

---

## Slide 10 — Bystander skills: what to do when you hear harmful language

- **Ignore it:** Sometimes the safest choice, especially if you feel unsafe
- **Laugh along:** Reinforces the behaviour — not recommended
- **Challenge it:** "I don't think that's okay" or "That's not cool" — can work, especially with friends
- **Talk privately:** "Hey, that comment about girls made me uncomfortable" — often more effective than public challenge
- **Get support:** Talk to a trusted adult if the behaviour is repeated or escalating

_Speaker note: Role-play or discuss scenarios: "A friend shares a misogynistic meme. What do you do?" Emphasise that challenging doesn't have to be confrontational. Help students find language that feels authentic to them. Acknowledge that bystander intervention takes courage and that it's okay to seek adult support._

---

## Slide 11 — Reflection and discussion

- What is one thing you learned today that surprised you?
- Have you noticed algorithms pushing content to you? What was it?
- What would help you feel confident to challenge harmful language in your peer group?
- If you had a concern about your own or a friend's online activity, who would you talk to?

_Speaker note: Use these as prompts for whole-group discussion, pair talk, or anonymous question box. Create space for genuine reflection. Some students may not be ready to share — that's okay. The goal is to plant seeds of critical thinking and show that support is available._

---

## Slide 12 — Where to get help

- **In school:** Talk to a trusted teacher, school counsellor, or safeguarding lead
- **At home:** A parent, carer, or older sibling you trust
- **Online:** Childline (0800 1111), NSPCC, or your local support service
- **If you're worried about a friend:** You can talk to an adult on their behalf — you don't have to handle it alone

_Speaker note: Provide school-specific contact details for safeguarding lead and counsellor. Emphasise that reaching out is a sign of strength, not weakness. If a student discloses concern about their own or a peer's online activity during the session, follow your school's safeguarding protocol and involve the designated safeguarding lead._

---

## Slide 13 — Thank you

- Healthy masculinity is about respect, emotional openness and equality
- You have the power to question what you see online and challenge harmful language in your peer group
- We're here to support you

_Speaker note: Close warmly. Reinforce that this conversation doesn't end today — it continues in peer groups, at home, and online. Thank students for their honesty and engagement. Remind them that support is always available._

# Facilitator notes — Understanding Healthy Masculinity and Challenging Misogyny Online

_In-person discussion · 75 min · English · ages 13–15_

---

## Before you start

### What this course is for

Year 9 students in this cohort have encountered online content from influencers like Andrew Tate that promotes harmful ideas about masculinity and women. Girls in the year group have reported feeling uncomfortable as a result. This session helps all students understand how algorithms amplify extreme content, recognise the difference between healthy and harmful masculinity, and develop critical thinking skills to challenge misogynistic language and behaviour in their peer groups. The goal is to build respect, emotional openness and gender equality — without shaming boys or pitting genders against each other.

### What you need to know about this group

- **Mixed-gender room.** Frame the session as a shared conversation about respect and critical thinking, not as "boys vs. girls."
- **Two parents have emailed about this topic.** Language and take-home materials need to be measured and evidence-based; avoid sensationalism.
- **Some boys may have encountered Andrew Tate content.** They may feel defensive, curious, or ashamed. Use curiosity, not confrontation.
- **Girls have reported discomfort.** Their voices and experiences are valid and need to be centred without making boys feel attacked.
- **Year 9 is a critical developmental stage.** Students are forming identities, increasingly influenced by peers and online communities, and developing abstract thinking. This is the right time to build critical literacy.

### Safeguarding flags

**Flag: Boys may feel shame or defensiveness if they have been exposed to manosphere content.**
- **What to do:** Use trauma-informed language. Acknowledge that algorithms push this content without consent. Frame the session as "let's understand this together," not "you've been fooled." Avoid labelling boys themselves as "toxic."

**Flag: Girls may have experienced or witnessed harassment, misogynistic comments, or body-rating in peer groups.**
- **What to do:** Create a safe space for girls to speak if they choose to. Listen without judgment. If a girl discloses ongoing harassment, follow your school's safeguarding protocol and inform the designated safeguarding lead immediately. Do not promise confidentiality you cannot keep.

**Flag: Some students may have been exposed to antisemitic, racist, or pro-terror content via manosphere influencers.**
- **What to do:** If a student mentions exposure to extremist content, do not dismiss it. Inform the designated safeguarding lead and your school's counter-extremism lead (if you have one). This may require referral to external support services.

**Flag: A student may disclose that they or a peer are being groomed, exploited, or abused online.**
- **What to do:** Do not investigate. Listen calmly. Tell the student: "Thank you for telling me. This is not your fault. I need to tell a trusted adult in school who can help." Immediately inform the designated safeguarding lead. Record what was said (as close to verbatim as possible) and the time. Follow your school's child protection policy.

**Flag: Do not name or shame specific students or the tutor who flagged the incident.**
- **What to do:** Keep the trigger abstract. Say "Some of you may have seen content online from influencers like Andrew Tate" — not "We know some boys in this year group have been watching Tate clips."

**Flag: Avoid graphic depictions of misogynistic content.**
- **What to do:** Refer to harmful ideas abstractly. Say "content that frames women as inferior" rather than showing or reading out specific slurs or degrading comments.

---

### Materials checklist

- [ ] Slides 1–13 (printed or on screen)
- [ ] Flip chart or whiteboard for brainstorming (Slide 7: "What does it mean to be a good guy?")
- [ ] Optional: Short, age-appropriate video clip or case study about algorithmic amplification (Slide 5) — pre-screened and approved by safeguarding lead
- [ ] Optional: Anonymous question box or online poll tool (Slide 11) — if you want to gather questions without names
- [ ] Ground rules poster or handout (to display during session)
- [ ] Take-home resource sheet with school-specific safeguarding contacts and external support services (Childline, NSPCC, local services)
- [ ] Facilitator copy of this document
- [ ] Timer or clock visible to you (to keep to 75 minutes)
- [ ] Tissues (in case a student becomes emotional)

---

## Running the session

### Slide 1 — Title

**Goal:** Welcome students warmly and establish psychological safety.

**Key points:**
- This is a safe space for genuine conversation — no judgment, all questions welcome.
- We are talking about the real world they inhabit: online platforms, peer groups, and the messages they encounter every day.
- Everyone's voice matters.

**Suggested phrasing:**
"Hi everyone. Thanks for being here. Today we're talking about something that's actually happening in your lives — online content, influencers, and what healthy relationships and respect look like. This is a space where you can ask questions, share ideas, and be honest. No judgment. We're figuring this out together."

**Watch for:**
- Students who look uncomfortable or withdrawn. Make eye contact and smile. Invite them to participate without pressure.
- Students who seem eager to dominate the conversation. You'll manage this with ground rules on the next slide.

**Time:** 1 minute

---

### Slide 2 — Why we're here today

**Goal:** Ground the session in the real trigger without naming individuals or shaming anyone.

**Key points:**
- Some students may have encountered content from influencers like Andrew Tate online.
- Girls in this year group have told us this content makes them feel uncomfortable at school.
- We want to understand what's happening, why it appeals to people, and what healthy masculinity actually looks like.
- This is about respect, critical thinking, and looking out for each other.

**Suggested phrasing:**
"You've probably heard about Andrew Tate or seen clips of him online — maybe at break, maybe on TikTok or YouTube. Some of you might have watched his stuff. That's not a problem. What we've noticed is that girls in this year group have said it makes them uncomfortable when boys are sharing this content or talking about it. So we want to have a real conversation about what's going on, why this content spreads so fast, and what healthy masculinity actually looks like. This isn't about blaming anyone. It's about understanding the system and looking out for each other."

**Watch for:**
- Boys who look defensive or embarrassed. Reassure them: "If you've seen this content, you're not in trouble. Algorithms push it to you without you asking for it. That's what we're going to talk about."
- Girls who nod or look relieved. This signals that the trigger is real for them. Validate their experience: "Your discomfort is real and valid. We're here to address it."

**Time:** 2 minutes

---

### Slide 3 — What we'll cover today

**Goal:** Set a clear agenda so students know what to expect and feel in control.

**Key points:**
- What is the "manosphere" and who are its key figures?
- How do social media algorithms push extreme content to you?
- Healthy masculinity vs. harmful stereotypes.
- The real impact on girls and peer relationships.
- How to think critically about online content and challenge harmful language.
- Where to get support.

**Suggested phrasing:**
"Here's what we're doing today. We're not lecturing — we're exploring together. We'll talk about what the manosphere is, how algorithms work, what healthy masculinity actually looks like, and how to think critically about what you see online. We'll also talk about how this affects girls and what you can do if you hear harmful language in your peer group. And we'll make sure you know where to get support if you need it."

**Watch for:**
- Students who seem relieved by the structure. This is good — it reduces anxiety.
- Students who look confused by the word "manosphere." You'll explain it on Slide 4.

**Time:** 1 minute

---

### Slide 4 — What is the manosphere?

**Goal:** Define the manosphere clearly and abstractly, without graphic content or shaming.

**Key points:**
- The manosphere is a network of online communities promoting misogynistic and anti-feminist ideas.
- Andrew Tate is a prominent example: he makes claims about women's roles, sells "self-improvement" courses, and promises success.
- This content often frames women as inferior or responsible for men's problems.
- It attracts teenage boys by offering a sense of belonging and simple answers to complex questions.

**Suggested phrasing:**
"The manosphere is basically a network of online communities — forums, YouTube channels, TikTok accounts — that promote ideas about women and relationships that are pretty harmful. Andrew Tate is one of the biggest names in this space. He says things like women belong in the home, that men should be dominant, that if you're not making money and having power, you're failing. He sells courses and merchandise based on these ideas. Why does this appeal to teenage boys? Because it offers simple answers. It says, 'Here's what's wrong with your life — it's women, or society, or your own weakness.' It offers a sense of belonging — like you're part of a group that gets it. But the ideas themselves are based on the idea that women are less than men, and that's not okay."

**Watch for:**
- Boys who nod or look interested. They may have encountered this content. Don't shame them. Ask: "Has anyone heard of Andrew Tate? Where did you hear about him?" Listen without judgment.
- Girls who look uncomfortable or angry. Validate: "I know this is frustrating to hear. We're going to talk about why this is harmful and what you can do about it."
- Students who want to defend Tate or argue that his ideas are true. Don't engage in debate. Say: "That's a fair question. Let's look at the evidence together as we go through the session."

**Time:** 5 minutes

---

### Slide 5 — Why does this content spread so fast?

**Goal:** Help students understand the algorithm, not blame themselves or their peers for being exposed to it.

**Key points:**
- Algorithms on TikTok and YouTube Shorts track what you watch, like and share.
- They recommend more of the same — even if you didn't search for it.
- Extreme content gets more engagement (likes, shares, comments) than balanced content.
- Platforms profit from engagement, not from truth or balance.

**Suggested phrasing:**
"Here's the thing about algorithms. Let's say you watch a fitness video on TikTok. The algorithm notices. It thinks, 'This person is interested in fitness.' So it recommends more fitness videos. But some of those videos are from manosphere influencers who frame fitness as part of becoming 'alpha' or dominant. You watch one. The algorithm thinks, 'Okay, they like this.' Within 9 minutes, you're seeing manosphere content. After 2–3 hours, 76% of your feed is misogynistic material. This isn't because you're a bad person or because you're looking for it. It's because the algorithm is designed to keep you watching, and extreme content keeps people watching. The platform doesn't care if the content is true or fair — they care if it gets clicks and engagement. That's how they make money."

**Watch for:**
- Students who look relieved. This is good — it shifts blame from individuals to the system.
- Students who want to share their own experiences with algorithms. Encourage this: "Have you noticed this on your own feed? What content keeps coming back?" This builds critical awareness.
- Students who seem skeptical. Ask: "Why do you think TikTok recommends more of what you watch?" Help them see the business model.

**Time:** 5 minutes

---

### Slide 6 — The business model behind influencers

**Goal:** Help students see that influencers have a financial incentive to be extreme, not to tell the truth.

**Key points:**
- Influencers like Tate profit from engagement and outrage.
- They sell "self-improvement" courses, merchandise, and exclusive content.
- The more controversial the message, the more people talk about it.
- They don't care if the message is true — they care if it gets clicks.

**Suggested phrasing:**
"Andrew Tate makes money in several ways. He sells courses on how to be 'alpha' or successful. He sells merchandise. He has exclusive content on subscription platforms. The more people watch, like, share and comment on his videos, the more money he makes. So his incentive is not to tell the truth — it's to be as extreme and controversial as possible. If he said something balanced and reasonable, people wouldn't talk about it. But if he says something outrageous about women or relationships, people get angry, they share it, they comment, and the algorithm pushes it to more people. That's how he makes money. So when you see his content, ask yourself: Who profits from me watching this? What is he trying to sell me? Is it true, or is it just designed to get my attention?"

**Watch for:**
- Students who look surprised or angry. This is good — it's the beginning of critical thinking.
- Students who want to defend Tate's right to make money. Say: "Sure, he has the right to make money. But we also have the right to question whether what he's saying is true and fair."

**Time:** 4 minutes

---

### Slide 7 — Healthy masculinity: what does it actually look like?

**Goal:** Reframe masculinity in positive terms and contrast it with harmful stereotypes.

**Key points:**
- Healthy masculinity includes: emotional awareness and openness, respect for others as equals, accountability, collective wellbeing, strength in kindness.
- Harmful stereotypes include: dominance, control, suppression of emotion, entitlement.
- Emotional openness is a strength, not a weakness.

**Suggested phrasing:**
"Let's flip this. What does healthy masculinity actually look like? It's emotional awareness — being able to name your feelings, not just pushing them down. It's respect for others, especially girls and women, as equals. It's accountability — taking responsibility for your actions and how they affect people. It's caring about collective wellbeing, not just your own status or power. It's strength in kindness, not dominance. Gareth Southgate, the England football manager, talked about this in a speech a few years ago. He said that emotional resilience and openness are strengths, not weaknesses. That's what healthy masculinity looks like. Now, what does the manosphere say? It says be dominant, be in control, suppress your emotions, don't show weakness. That's the contrast. One version is about respect and connection. The other is about power and control."

**Watch for:**
- Boys who look thoughtful or relieved. Some may have felt pressure to be "tough" and may be relieved to hear that emotional openness is okay.
- Boys who look skeptical or defensive. Ask: "What does masculinity mean to you? What do you see in your own life?" Help them see that healthy masculinity is already around them.
- Girls who nod or look validated. This is good.

**Suggested activity (if time allows):**
Use a flip chart or whiteboard. Ask: "What does it mean to be a 'good guy' or a 'real man'?" Capture responses. Then sort them into "healthy" and "harmful" categories. This makes the contrast concrete.

**Time:** 6 minutes

---

### Slide 8 — The impact on girls and peer relationships

**Goal:** Build empathy and help students understand the real-world consequences of misogynistic language and behaviour.

**Key points:**
- Girls report feeling unsafe or uncomfortable when boys share misogynistic content.
- Jokes about women's bodies or roles affect girls' sense of belonging in school.
- When boys rate girls or make degrading comments, it changes the dynamic in the room.
- Girls deserve to feel respected and safe in their peer group.

**Suggested phrasing:**
"Let's talk about what this actually feels like for girls. When boys are sharing misogynistic content or making jokes about women's bodies or roles, girls feel uncomfortable. They feel like they're not safe or respected. They feel like they don't belong. Imagine you're in a group chat and boys are rating girls' bodies or saying women belong in the home. How would that feel? Now imagine that's happening in your school, in your classes, at break. That's what some girls in this year group have told us. They've said it makes them uncomfortable. This isn't about blaming boys — it's about understanding impact. When you share content or make jokes that demean women, it changes how girls feel in the room. It changes the dynamic. Girls deserve to feel respected and safe in their peer group, just like boys do."

**Watch for:**
- Girls who look relieved or validated. Some may want to share their experiences. Create space for this if they volunteer, but don't pressure them.
- Boys who look uncomfortable or defensive. Reassure: "This isn't about blaming you. It's about understanding impact and making things better."
- Students who want to argue that "it's just a joke." Say: "I hear you. But jokes that demean women have an impact. Let's talk about what that impact is."

**Time:** 5 minutes

---

### Slide 9 — Critical questions to ask about online content

**Goal:** Teach a practical framework for critical digital literacy that students can use in real life.

**Key points:**
- Who created this? What is their background and motivation?
- Who profits from you watching, liking or sharing it?
- What message is being sold? Is it fair and accurate?
- Who does this message harm?
- What would a balanced, respectful version of this message look like?

**Suggested phrasing:**
"Here's a framework you can use whenever you see online content — from anyone, not just manosphere influencers. Ask yourself: Who created this? What do I know about them? Who profits from me watching, liking or sharing it? What message is being sold? Is it fair and accurate? Who does this message harm? What would a balanced, respectful version of this message look like? These questions help you think critically instead of just accepting what you see. Let's apply this to a clip or post from a manosphere influencer. [Show or describe content.] Who created it? Andrew Tate. What's his motivation? To make money and build his brand. Who profits? He does — from engagement, courses, merchandise. What message is being sold? That women are inferior, that dominance is strength, that you need to buy his course to succeed. Is it fair and accurate? No — it's based on harmful stereotypes and it ignores evidence about healthy relationships. Who does it harm? Women, girls, boys who feel pressure to be 'alpha.' What would a balanced version look like? A message about how to build confidence and success that respects women as equals and doesn't rely on dominance."

**Watch for:**
- Students who engage with the framework and ask good questions. Encourage this.
- Students who struggle to apply it. Help them by asking the questions together.
- Students who want to defend the content. Don't debate. Say: "That's a fair question. Let's look at the evidence together."

**Time:** 6 minutes

---

### Slide 10 — Bystander skills: what to do when you hear harmful language

**Goal:** Give students practical, low-pressure strategies for responding to misogynistic language and behaviour in their peer group.

**Key points:**
- **Ignore it:** Sometimes the safest choice, especially if you feel unsafe.
- **Laugh along:** Reinforces the behaviour — not recommended.
- **Challenge it:** "I don't think that's okay" or "That's not cool" — can work, especially with friends.
- **Talk privately:** "Hey, that comment about girls made me uncomfortable" — often more effective than public challenge.
- **Get support:** Talk to a trusted adult if the behaviour is repeated or escalating.

**Suggested phrasing:**
"So you hear a friend make a misogynistic comment or share a degrading meme. What do you do? Here are your options. You can ignore it — sometimes that's the safest choice, especially if you feel unsafe or if the person is aggressive. You can laugh along — but that reinforces the behaviour, so it's not ideal. You can challenge it in the moment: 'I don't think that's okay' or 'That's not cool.' This can work, especially with friends who respect you. You can talk to them privately later: 'Hey, that comment about girls made me uncomfortable. I don't think you meant it that way, but it landed badly.' This is often more effective because it doesn't put them on the defensive in front of others. Or you can get support from a trusted adult — a teacher, counsellor, parent — if the behaviour is repeated or escalating. All of these are valid. The point is, you have options. You don't have to just accept it."

**Watch for:**
- Students who look relieved. Some may have felt stuck when they heard harmful language.
- Students who want to role-play or discuss scenarios. Encourage this: "Let's try it. A friend shares a misogynistic meme. What do you say?" Help them find language that feels authentic.
- Students who worry about social consequences. Acknowledge: "I know it can feel risky to challenge a friend. That's real. But you can do it in a way that's respectful and private."

**Suggested activity (if time allows):**
Role-play or pair discussion. Scenario: "A friend shares a meme that rates girls' bodies. What do you do?" Have pairs discuss or act out different responses. Debrief: "What felt most authentic to you? What would actually work with your friends?"

**Time:** 6 minutes

---

### Slide 11 — Reflection and discussion

**Goal:** Create space for genuine reflection and allow students to process what they've learned.

**Key points:**
- What is one thing you learned today that surprised you?
- Have you noticed algorithms pushing content to you? What was it?
- What would help you feel confident to challenge harmful language in your peer group?
- If you had a concern about your own or a friend's online activity, who would you talk to?

**Suggested phrasing:**
"Let's take a moment to reflect. I'm going to ask some questions. You can answer out loud, talk to a partner, or write them down if you prefer. What is one thing you learned today that surprised you? Have you noticed algorithms pushing content to you? What was it? What would help you feel confident to challenge harmful language in your peer group? If you had a concern about your own or a friend's online activity, who would you talk to? You don't have to share if you don't want to. But I'd love to hear what's on your mind."

**Watch for:**
- Students who want to share genuine reflections. Listen actively and validate.
- Students who disclose concerns about their own or a peer's online activity. Listen calmly. If it's a safeguarding concern, follow the protocol below (see "If a student discloses something concerning").
- Students who are quiet. Don't pressure them. Some people process internally.

**Optional tools:**
- Anonymous question box: Students write questions or reflections on cards and drop them in a box. You read them aloud and respond.
- Online poll: Use a tool like Mentimeter or Google Forms to gather anonymous responses.

**Time:** 8 minutes

---

### Slide 12 — Where to get help

**Goal:** Signpost to support and make it clear that reaching out is a sign of strength.

**Key points:**
- In school: Talk to a trusted teacher, school counsellor, or safeguarding lead.
- At home: A parent, carer, or older sibling you trust.
- Online: Childline (0800 1111), NSPCC, or your local support service.
- If you're worried about a friend: You can talk to an adult on their behalf — you don't have to handle it alone.

**Suggested phrasing:**
"If you have a concern about your own or a friend's online activity, or if you've experienced harassment or abuse, here's where you can get help. In school, you can talk to [name of safeguarding lead], [name of school counsellor], or any teacher you trust. At home, talk to a parent, carer, or older sibling. Online, you can call Childline on 0800 1111 — they're available 24/7 and you can talk about anything. You can also text NSPCC or look up your local support service. And here's the important bit: if you're worried about a friend, you can talk to an adult on their behalf. You don't have to handle it alone. Reaching out is a sign of strength, not weakness."

**Watch for:**
- Students who look relieved to know where to go.
- Students who look skeptical about reaching out. Reassure: "I know it can feel scary to tell an adult. But they're there to help, not to judge."

**Materials to provide:**
- Printed resource sheet with school-specific safeguarding contacts and external support services (Childline, NSPCC, local services). Distribute to all students.

**Time:** 2 minutes

---

### Slide 13 — Thank you

**Goal:** Close warmly and reinforce key messages.

**Key points:**
- Healthy masculinity is about respect, emotional openness and equality.
- You have the power to question what you see online and challenge harmful language in your peer group.
- We're here to support you.

**Suggested phrasing:**
"Thank you for being here and for being honest. Here's what I want you to take away: Healthy masculinity is about respect, emotional openness and equality. You have the power to question what you see online and challenge harmful language in your peer group. And we're here to support you. This conversation doesn't end today — it continues in your peer groups, at home, and online. Keep thinking critically. Keep looking out for each other. And if you need support, reach out."

**Watch for:**
- Students who look thoughtful or relieved.
- Students who want to continue the conversation after the session. Encourage them to talk to a trusted adult or reach out to you if they have questions.

**Time:** 1 minute

---

## Discussion management

### Likely questions and how to handle them

**Q: "But Andrew Tate says he's just giving advice. Why is that harmful?"**
A: "He's giving advice based on the idea that women are inferior and that dominance is strength. That's harmful because it's not true, and it affects how people treat each other. We can give advice about success and confidence without putting women down."

**Q: "Isn't it just a joke? People are too sensitive."**
A: "Jokes that demean women have an impact — they make girls feel unsafe and disrespected. We can be funny without putting people down. And when girls tell us they feel uncomfortable, that's not being sensitive — that's real feedback about how the joke landed."

**Q: "If I challenge my friends, they'll think I'm weak or uncool."**
A: "That's a real worry. But you might be surprised. A lot of people feel uncomfortable with this stuff but don't know how to say it. When you speak up, you give others permission to do the same. And real friends respect you for being honest, even if it's uncomfortable."

**Q: "What about free speech? Shouldn't people be allowed to say what they want?"**
A: "Free speech is important. But free speech doesn't mean free from consequences. Andrew Tate can say what he wants — and we can question it, criticise it, and choose not to amplify it. That's also free speech."

**Q: "Are you saying all boys are bad?"**
A: "No. I'm saying that some ideas about masculinity are harmful, and that healthy masculinity — respect, emotional openness, equality — is what we should be aiming for. Most boys are good people. This is about making sure we're all thinking critically about the messages we receive."

**Q: "What if I've already watched a lot of this content? Does that make me a bad person?"**
A: "No. Algorithms push this content to you without you asking for it. Watching it doesn't make you bad. What matters is what you do with it — do you question it, or do you accept it? This session is about helping you think critically so you can make your own choices."

---

### If the conversation goes off-topic

**Move 1: Acknowledge and redirect.**
"That's a good question, and I can see why you're asking it. Let's come back to that after the session — I want to make sure we cover everything we planned. For now, let's focus on [topic]."

**Move 2: Connect to the main theme.**
"I hear you. That's related to what we're talking about — how online content affects us and how we think about it. Let's see if we can connect it to [specific slide or topic]."

**Move 3: Defer to a trusted adult.**
"That's something you might want to talk to [teacher/counsellor/parent] about. For now, let's stay with what we're covering today."

---

### If a student discloses something concerning

**If a student discloses exposure to extremist content (antisemitic, racist, pro-terror):**

1. Listen calmly. Do not show alarm or judgment.
2. Say: "Thank you for telling me. That's important information."
3. Do not investigate or ask leading questions.
4. Immediately after the session, inform the designated safeguarding lead and your school's counter-extremism lead (if you have one).
5. Record what was said (as close to verbatim as possible), the time, and the student's name.
6. Follow your school's child protection policy. This may require referral to external support services (e.g., Channel programme).

**If a student discloses that they or a peer are being groomed, exploited, or abused online:**

1. Listen calmly. Do not show alarm.
2. Say: "Thank you for telling me. This is not your fault. I need to tell a trusted adult in school who can help."
3. Do not promise confidentiality. Say: "I can't keep this secret, but I will make sure you're safe."
4. Do not investigate or ask leading questions.
5. Immediately inform the designated safeguarding lead.
6. Record what was said (as close to verbatim as possible), the time, and the student's name.
7. Follow your school's child protection policy. This will likely involve contacting the police or local authority children's services.

**If a student discloses that they have experienced harassment, misogyny, or abuse from a peer:**

1. Listen calmly and validate their experience: "I'm sorry that happened. That's not okay."
2. Ask: "Do you feel safe at school right now?" If no, involve the safeguarding lead immediately.
3. Say: "I'm going to tell [safeguarding lead] so we can make sure this stops and you're supported."
4. Do not promise to keep it secret. Be clear about what you will and won't tell others.
5. Immediately inform the designated safeguarding lead.
6. Record what was said, the time, and the student's name.
7. Follow your school's behaviour and safeguarding policies. This may involve disciplinary action against the peer, support for the student, and communication with parents.

**If a student discloses that they are struggling with their own online behaviour or attitudes:**

1. Listen without judgment.
2. Say: "Thank you for being honest. That takes courage. Let's talk about how to move forward."
3. Offer support: "Would you like to talk to [counsellor/trusted adult] about this?"
4. Do not shame or punish. Frame it as an opportunity to learn and change.
5. If the behaviour is harmful to others (e.g., they've been sending misogynistic messages to girls), involve the safeguarding lead so the school can support both the student and those affected.

---

## After the session

### What to log

Capture these points in a brief debrief to send to Shift and your safeguarding lead:

- **Engagement:** How many students participated in discussion? Were there any who were notably quiet or disengaged?
- **Reactions:** Did any students show signs of discomfort, defensiveness, or strong emotion? What triggered it?
- **Disclosures:** Did any student disclose a safeguarding concern? (Log separately and immediately with safeguarding lead.)
- **Questions:** What questions came up that surprised you or that you couldn't answer?
- **Peer dynamics:** Did you notice any shifts in how boys and girls interacted during or after the session?
- **Follow-up needed:** Are there any students who need additional support or a follow-up conversation?
- **What worked:** What activities or phrasing landed well? What would you do differently next time?

---

### Follow-up resources

**For students:**

- **Childline:** 0800 1111 (24/7, free, confidential)
- **NSPCC:** 0808 800 5000 or text NSPCC to 60066
- **Beyond Equality:** Resources on healthy masculinity and gender equality
- **White Ribbon:** Campaign against violence toward women; resources for men and boys
- **Plan International UK:** Resources on gender equality and girls' rights

**For parents (provide on take-home sheet):**

- **Internet Matters:** Guidance on online safety and algorithm awareness
- **Common Sense Media:** Resources on social media and young people
- **Childline Parent Guide:** How to talk to your child about online safety
- **NSPCC:** Resources on safeguarding and online abuse

**For school staff:**

- **UK Safer Internet Centre:** Resources on online safety and digital literacy
- **Ofsted:** Guidance on safeguarding and RSHE
- **DfE:** Statutory guidance on Relationships, Sex and Health Education (RSHE)
- **Counter-Extremism Programme:** Resources on identifying and supporting young people at risk of radicalisation

**School-specific contacts (to be added by your safeguarding lead):**

- Designated Safeguarding Lead: [